Okay, first off—this little green monster is LOUD. Like, 'scare-the-neighbors' loud. My daughter begged for it, and now she complains it’s too aggressive. Mission accomplished, clock.

The retro vibe is adorable, though. It’s sturdy (survived multiple falls thanks to my cat’s 3 AM zoomies), and the glow-in-the-dark dots on the hands? Cute, but useless. Like trying to read hieroglyphics in a cave.

Pros: The backlight button is handy (but why do I have to HOLD it like some kind of hostage negotiation?). No ticking sounds—bless. And the bell? Chef’s kiss for waking up my teenage hibernator.

Cons: The alarm has no AM/PM setting, so it’s a twice-daily surprise party. Also, no snooze button—just pure, chaotic accountability. Battery dies? Clock prioritizes timekeeping over alarms. Rude.

Verdict: It’s flawed, charming, and weirdly effective. Would I buy it again? Probably. Do I resent it at 6 AM? Absolutely.